Caning Sophie #Spanking

This is a compete teaser - I totally admit that now. It is from Aching To Submit, my newest release.

This is one of two scenes I've ever written where there are more than two players during a spanking. In this case, Sophie is about to get caned by Kyan, the club owner. But as she belongs to Michael, Kyan first must ask permission - which Michael, of course, grants.

Julia, Kyan's wife, gags her just before the caning begins and is the one to remove it just after her punishment. I think my favorite part is Michael's part at the very end of this little snippet.

                                                 * * * *

“I’d like to use the cane, Michael,” Kyan said simply.

Michael looked at Sophie who looked back at him, eyes wide and trusting. He smiled softly, then nodded to Kyan without breaking eye contact with Sophie.

“Julia, gag her,” Kyan said.

Julia came to kneel beside Michael. “You won’t be able to say your safeword with this in,” she began, petting her hair as she spoke. “Just tap on the bench three times to signal you’re using it. Understand?” she asked.

Sophie nodded.

Julia touched her cheek with a warm, sweet smile on her face before sliding the ball gag into her mouth and securing it.

When she walked away, Sophie looked at Michael, her mouth wide around the gag. He reached forward and kissed her cheek, her ear, her hair. Kyan waited until he had moved away to lay the first stroke of the cane across her ass.

The whippy sound was different and Sophie tensed instantly. She closed her eyes when it struck, but it was a moment before she made any sound.

“Okay?” he asked, touching her sweaty face.

She blinked once and managed a small nod, looking into his eyes as she braced for the next stroke.

Michael glanced at Kyan and Kyan struck again.

She made a sound that was muffled behind the gag, her hands fisted, tears seemingly being pushed from her eyes.

Michael’s cock hardened even more than it already was.

“Again,” he said aloud.

The sound, like a whistle, one that he would now never forget, filled his ears.

Sophie made a pained noise and looked at him.

“Again,” he said, never breaking eye contact with her. A part of him knew that although he was not the one delivering her pain, he was the cause of it. The thought made him hungrier.

“Two more. Last ones.”

“I’d like to strike her thighs,” Kyan said. “These will be more painful.”

Michael only nodded his permission.

“Two more on each thigh or two total?” Kyan asked.

Michael looked at her position and realized that splayed as she was, he’d have to strike each thigh separately.

“Two on each.”

---

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Aching To Submit will be listed on Blushing's site this week

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Submission in Real Life - Round Table Discussion

If you read last week's Round Table post, you have a brief introduction to me. That or you've already heard way more than you ever wanted to know anyway so on to today's post which is - in one word - submission. There are quite a few of us participating today so make sure to visit the Spanking Romance Review site to check out the rest of the posts.

Let me first define submission. Dictionary says -  the action or fact of accepting or yielding to a superior force or to the will or authority of another person.

Personally, I would define it as a gift of surrender. In my mind, this is not a 24/7 thing. This is a gift given over a certain period of time where there is an exchange of power, I relinquish mine over to him. It is a gift given, never taken, never asked for. It is simply given.

I've learned something in the past weeks. I've learned I'm much more traditional than I thought in that I am only able to give this gift to my husband. That's a whole other topic and it's not really important for this discussion so I'll leave it for now, but that was a huge learning for me.

In reality, this area is new for me. I'm in a whole new place with no reference points where we're learning as we go. One thing I've learned is that in reality, submission is not as perfect or easy as in fiction. Yes, I knew that but I now really know that. And to be very honest, in reality, the act of submitting or surrendering is very difficult for me. In my mind, in my fantasies, I submit. It's easy. It's sexy, it's my whole being. But in reality, I fight it even as I long for it - long to just do it, to give it, to let go and give it.

I'm sitting here writing this and have been trying to write this post in the past days, but it's a much more difficult post to write than I thought it would be. Partly I think it's because it is a personal post - and how much do I want to share? How much can I give away of myself?

I think I'm going to do this the only way I know how - through my writing - in a sort of poem or offering. Here it is - the ideal submission in my mind:

---

I stand naked before him while he is fully clothed.
He tells me to kneel with my hips resting on my heels, knees wide.
He stands behind me, walks to the side of me, watches me as I look straight ahead at nothing.
He tells me to rest my forehead on the ground. I lean forward to do that. At his direction, I extend my arms forward, my forehead touching the cool, hard wood.

I'm to remain as I am.
He is somewhere behind me. I feel exposed.
 He does not touch me and I do not move. I close my eyes, then I open them.
Vulnerability flows through me. Resistance wants me to straighten but it's not as strong as my  desire to submit.

I remain as I am for I don't know how long. As long as he wants me to be.
When he tells me I may straighten, I may stand, I may come kneel beside him, rest my head on his thigh as he caresses my hair, I feel soft. I feel my eyes are reddened, not from tears but from my submission. He does not speak to me and I rest against him, close to him and for the first time, I am submissive.

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Fiction vs. Reality in Spanking and DD

I get pretty caught up in the images and ideals of the heroes of our books and the perfect spanking and love scenes. No one every does anything wrong, the hero always knows how and when to take charge, he's really just always the perfect Dom - even his first time around. The heroine, even as she's sobbing in the arms of her lover/disciplinarian, never has to wipe away snot and there are no awkward moments.

Reality, however, is a little different.

These posts I'm linking here talk about this both seriously and humorously. When I read Katherine Deane's interview of Patricia Green, I could absolutely relate. Patricia's advice of 'take care of your fences' is still giving me goosebumps.

The Secret Spanko's post on reality vs. expectations in a relationship when one partner is kinky and the other not is humorous but with a serious undertone. Even as the vanilla partner may want to try to please his/her spouse, often times, something is missing. The hamburger analogy sums it all right up.

Casey McKay makes me smile. No, sex in the shower in real life isn't that hot - at least not for me. TMI, sorry but soap in the eyes, water is too cold/hot or being hogged by the larger partner, can't quite get a grip…ok, you probably want me to stop… Take a moment and have a look.

Here are the links:

Katherine Deane - Adventures in Romance
and
Secret Spanko
and
Casey McKay

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Kiss Me Hard Before You Go

I was in a shop on Friday and heard the song Summertime Sadness by Lana Del Rey. I love her voice but don't love all her music. When I heard this though, oh wow, I stayed in the shop until the song was over. I didn't buy anything though - I wanted a new dress but sadly saw nothing. 

When I got home, I put the song on again (love Spotify) - and again - and again… I'm kind of obsessive. So here's to saying goodbye.

First, goodbye to summer. We've had an amazing summer here in Holland which I thought would never happen. Hardly any rain for six weeks. Went to the beach for the last time this season and it was really wonderful and I'm ok to say goodbye now as it's been so beautiful.

Another goodbye - this one is a really good one. I had written an e-mail to a friend and he questioned something I had said in that message. It was something about shame - shame at my kink. He questioned that and as soon as he did, I realized it was an old sentence. An old shame and it didn't fit anymore. I no longer felt or feel ashamed about my kink. In fact, I am starting to think people will prefer me to stop talking about it! Ah well, I've been silent so long I've got some making up to do. 

So, to shame I say: I don't know when you left, but I'm glad you did. Wait, to put a positive spin on it - I'm glad you changed into something other than what you were.

I feel like I had something else to say goodbye to but kids are around as I write this, someone's baking a cake, I'm trying to listen to my song, and I must go. Have a lovely Sunday.

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Devotion As Submission

I feel like I'm talking about this all the time but it's still such a huge topic for me. Although I don't subscribe to a religion, I consider myself spiritual. I have the live and let live philosophy and it makes life so much easier. You can avoid so much drama by just letting people be, letting everything just be. But yoga is the piece that adds the juicy bits to that straightforward way of being.

I discovered yoga nine years ago. It was Baron Baptiste who could hold my attention back then and not because he was hot, although that didn't hurt. He just taught a class where the rug was pulled out from under you over and over again and all your bullshit was called out and he wasn't beating around the bush about it. I had (have?) a lot of bullshit.

I used to teach Baptiste Power Vinyasa Yoga and I firmly believe in the power of something as physical as yoga taking someone to a place so completely not physical. For me, the more challenging the posture, the more it hurt, the more I was in. That physical discomfort forced me to find center, find my breath, stop the chatter in my head and focus and then, if it's a good day, melt into it. Just give over to the pain and let it have me and just maybe, I find some peace there.

I made a joke once that isn't a joke at all really. I think yoga teachers are sadists and students are masochists coming back for more and more. On a side note, I believe the opposite of every truth resides within that same thing - or in this case - person. Did that make sense? 

I was talking with a friend not too long ago and he said something that has stuck with me. Hopefully, I get it right because he wrapped this all up so nicely. He said something like - or maybe I should say I understood something like: "devotion will be the expression of your submission." Those words are some of the loveliest that have ever been strung together in my mind. He managed to bring two very important parts of my life together and just summed it up so neatly. It's still something that requires some exploration from me but I get goose bumps thinking about it. 

Anyhow, my post has turned into rambling again, but I think that's part of it. Ramble and talk and read and listen and really hear and maybe you can uncover another layer and get closer to the core.

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Good Girl - Two Word That Make Me Weak at the Knees

I have been obsessed with the song Blurred Lines ever since I first heard it. The tune was catchy, his voice was nice but there was definitely something else about it that just grabbed me. I always have that with music - for me, it's the words - and I know straight away if I'm loving it or it's going to be OK or whatever.

At first, I couldn't figure out what it was I liked about it. It's fairly simple and I quite like something a little heavier, something I can brood over. Mumford and Sons has a song that describes this well:

And the darkness can descend,
We can relish all the pain.
But I know that's what you love,
Cause you know I love the same…"

- Mumford and Sons, Where Are You Now

I relish the pain. I like it. I'm drawn to it and it's usually how I connect with people. But here was this simple song and I finally - finally - figured it out. Yes, I'm a little slow.

It was the good girl reference. When he sings 'you're a good girl', it just speaks to me, makes my belly go all soft and really just makes me want to sit up and pay attention and do whatever he says. I'm submissive by nature and this just hits a button - it's a total trigger.

I'm not going to get all broody now - instead I'm off to listen to the song one more time. Maybe do a little dance in my kitchen - consider yourselves lucky you don't have to witness that. I've linked the video above so if you click on the song title, you can enjoy it right along with me. 

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